So that's what I've been doing wrong. I keep whoring myself out to small businesses, Mom & Pop shops. If I could land a gig whoring for a Fortune 500, I'd be set!

@Chris Estey re: Brain Freeze -- Man up. Seriously. It hurts for a while, but your taste buds will thank you. Plus, that pain means you're probably killing the brain cells that keep track of complex math skills, and who needs that? You're just making room for more important facts.

Let's take this topic and turn it: How does one handle the social faux pas of showing up to a business meeting with a blue tongue inflicted by your tasty frozen treat? My boss wants to know.