I'll never forget the crushing disappointment I felt when I found an Enya CD in my ex-girlfriend's stack. Truly, it was a warning sign.

What I look for when I'm judging new friends -- and I judge constantly -- is stuff I've never heard of. If someone has a spare Everclear disc or a couple of New Kids on the Block albums, I can probably overlook that... provided I'm never forced to listen to "Hangin' Tough" while sober. But if there's nothing exciting in their collection, if the whole of my new crush's musical interest falls somewhere between Dave Matthews Band and Counting Crows, it's gonna take a lot of effort to keep crushing.

We've all made musical mistakes. I bought a Salt 'N Peppa disc when I was 13 that I still have, and went through an unfortunate period where I listened to Tonic. The idea is that we're supposed to learn from those mistakes.

And get rid of the evidence.

Yes, that is an impt lesson -- destroy the evidence!

Although I've yet to be invited into someone's apartment after (or during!) a first date, but should I hypothetically be in her apartment (probably after many dates and only briefly to use the restroom), if she had on her CD (or record) shelf: Pet Sounds, Exile in Guyville, Dig Me Out AND Let Go, I would suggest we leave immediately for the airport and fly to Las Vegas.

Haha, this is a great topic. One time a guy I was dating sat me down and forced me to listen to live Phish for about 30 minutes. (Or was it a month? That's what it felt like!)

Never underestimate the power of a great (or terrible) record collection.

on a similar note, i think what's worse than them having horrible taste is if they have amazing taste, and then when you break up you can't listen to any of that great stuff anymore.

the first thing that popped into my head when i read this entry was OK Computer. i agree with Cory though, anything between Dave Matthews and Counting Crows could be a deal-breaker.

Hah. I'm going to save this scenario for one of those first-date "you're a horrible conversationalist, so we have to resort to gimmicks" things.

I always at first look for a discernable taste in a music collection rather than specific titles. Those girls who only have a totally random "I like all kinds of music" (translation: I don't listen to music) collection from stuff stolen from previous boyfriends are a no-no. It's never a good idea to encounter although I love, say, Sisters of Mercy and Nirvana, it's a little disconcerting to me to not be able to tell how she got from point A to point B.

Big plusses: The Clash. The Cure. The Clash. Ramones. The Smiths. Hefner. Dis Plan. Any band related to The Clash (Strummer, BAD, Havanna 3a.m. etc) in conjunction with the last angry band is the first step to true love.

Worst part of my ex's music collection: Some Pretty Boy Floyd album on casssette. I should have known better.

BIS, LIZ, BIS!!!!

Dana, you get THE NIGHTMARE AWARD for "the Phish incident."

I knew that I was in love with the girl who became my wife for the past thirteen years when I saw that she had what artists should listen to -- 4AD ambient-goth stuff, indie folk, riot grrrl punk rock -- but also had three death metal tapes. To a dude, adorable girl + arty + a little bit hardcore = Freak Love.

That's cute Estey. Adorable even. Freak love rulz... and Geek Love! (awesome book by the way)
IGshr*e

OK, sure, Elle, but what if it was the Billboard Pop Top 40 for like 1980, with The Clash and Pretenders and some good disco and funk songs? Or what if it was some weird fucking year like 1973 and that was ALL they had, which might be kind of creepy in an intriguing way? Ha ha ha. Just kidding. (A good book to read about this is the Celine Dion 33 1/3 book, in which the author Carl Wilson spends a lot of effort trying to figure out why some basically decent people listen to shit like, well, Celine Dion. He interviews many of her fans, and it it freaks him the fuck out how at least a couple of them are not ... completely ... unlike ... him. Maybe my best read of last year.)

At that little bar (the green room?) in the Showbox during a Drive-By Truckers show the lead singer of The Black Angels, the co-owner of their label, a certain local alt-weekly rock columnist, and myself sat as a blonde, middle aged President of the Lionel Richie fan club partied with us, buying round after round of booze to tell us how much she loved him. She must have spent hundreds of dollars, maybe more, getting us sloshed and explaining her passion. I kept saying, "Really? REALLY?" and she would make fun of me but keep getting me drunk. Good times. Missed the fucking show though.

"(and totally bring on the obligatory burn of judging me for talking about the idea of judging others)"
Fuck that, Liz! Judging is a completely human nature thing to do. Plus, a person's music taste says A LOT about them.

I've found if I go over to a perspective friend's house whose CD collection looks straight off KISS 106.1's play list, we probably overall don't have much in common.

[Edited for Estey's sake ;) ]

A boy I liked last year listened to great music in class (The Libertines, Sharon Jones, bands I'd never even heard of), but whenever I got into his car, it was all Hardcore Music! Hardcore Music and AFI haha. But he had the grace to apologize for the AFI.

I dunno... I'd have to say my bias, my absolute DEAL BREAKER, is if they have a bunch of "best of" compilations. Like, to Liz's original post: I'd better see Meat Is Murder AND Hatful of Hollow AND The Queen is Dead AND the first Smiths record. Not that 'Best Of'.

One or two of those, okay. A full collection? I'm outta there.

And don't get me started on "Now that's what I call..."

the girl/ guy with the great record collection may not be the girl/guy for you. taste in music does not a personality make. i'd rather have someone argue with compassion and love for their worn copy of "august and everything after" or "...and out come the wolves", or any other such 90s major label cliche. we were all young once, and i think it's really distasteful to shun your old listening habits for newer, cooler ones in the name of making a good impression. best case scenario? she listens to stuff i don't know much about, and knows how to make a nice mix for me.

that said, if you don't already listen to the magnetic fields, or XTC, then hanging out with me in any capacity will result in me doing my damndest to get you into stephin merritt and andy partridge. you have no choice in the matter. it's for your own good, really...