IMAGI-BLOG
Dear Britney, When Walmart turns against you, you know you're in trouble.
Submitted by Erik Gonzalez on November 7, 2007.Hi Britney!
So, every one was all ga-ga and excited to think that even with all the turmoil that Baby Mama Spears can created in the last year, her album Blackout would return her to the #1 superstar that you are so convinced that you are. Well, better grab a mocha-cappuccino latte Brits, because you ain't going to be #1 in this country!
Yes, because DON HENLEY and his EAGLES kicked your ass, thanks to the superpower of music, um, er, Walmart/Sam's Club.
See, the new Eagles album, Long Road Out of Eden, is only available right now at your local Walmart/Sam's Club. And previous to this, Walmart didn't report to Billboard, so sales at Walmart didn't count towards the Billboard Top 200 Albums.
But, sorry Britney, times have have changed.
So, whereas your 290,000 sales of Blackout are pretty keen considering you're borderline insane behavior, the Eagles sold a mere 711,000 copes of Long Road Out of Eden. Yes, they only outsold you by a ~2.5:1 ratio. Sorry, but you're #2. Get used to it.
And you can thank all the loyal shoppers at Walmart for that one. I wonder how late Carl's Jr is open?
Love,
Erik G
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randy said on November 7, 2007:
Shouldn't there also be a choice 4) All of the above.?
Never been in a WalMart.
Never listened to a Britney album.
Haven't listened to a new Eagles album in, oh, 20+ years...
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Imaginary Kiku said on November 8, 2007:
I love this new fad of writing pretend letters to celebrities :]
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Reviews
imaginary dana said on November 7, 2007:
I'm trying to think of what I'd like to do least:
1) Listen to the new Britney Spears record.
2) Listen to the new Eagles record.
3) Spend the hour or so it would take listening to either of those records in a Walmart.
I think #2 has it, by a hair.